Addy informed me recently that we’re in Vascular Birthmark Awareness month (the month of May)! And apparently, on May 15, people put red hearts on their face or body wherever their loved one has a vascular birthmark, like a port wine stain or hemangioma. (Check out the difference between port wine stains and hemangiomas here.)

In a spectacular parenting faux pas, I totally forgot that this was coming. I got busy with other things as May 15 drew closer. My head was filled with all the things I had to do, like Zoom meetings with clients. And I forgot about Vascular Birthmark Day.

Until that day.

Addy asked me that morning: “MOM! Are you going to do the thing where you put the red stuff on your face?”

Me: “Honey, I have zoom calls today, I can’t be just putting something weird on my fa-“

[Realizing she was talking about vascular birthmark day, where people put red hearts on the spot their loved one has a port wine stain…]

[Awkward silence…]

Me: “Hand me that lipstick.”

And that’s how I ended up in meetings with a big red thing on my face (just like Addy)!

At School

When I dropped Addy off at school, her school director, Mr. Martinez, asked me for the story behind the heart on my cheek. I told him about vascular birthmark day for Addy… and that’s how Mr. Martinez ended up with a heart on his face, too!

And then… Addy’s friends added hearts to their faces.

And then… friends of Addy’s friends got in on the action, and added hearts to their faces, too.

And then… other teachers asked their students why so many kids had hearts on their faces, so they asked to be hearted-up, too.

And so, by the end of the day, there were A LOT of students, teachers, and staff with red hearts on their faces, for Addy’s sake.

Even “Francis the Mouse”!

I cannot overstate my awe at the love this community shows. I see it all the time as this little school community comes together for each other in different ways. I know the humans here are awesome. But the sheer volume of love we receive from them never ceases to amaze me.

When Addy was born, I feared for her. I feared that she’d be the easiest bullying target in the room — in every room she’d ever walk into. I feared that the pointing, the stares, and the poking of her face she was receiving regularly would make her want to hide away and not be seen. I feared for her confidence, for her mental health, for her perspective of her own beauty.

And while Keith and I have done a lot of work to get her to this point where she’s sixteen, confident, and comfortable (which I’ll write more about soon), we haven’t done the work alone. We haven’t walked this route alone. At every step, we’ve been accompanied by teachers, friends, staff, grandparents, extended family, and hundreds of other people who have spoken life and love and beauty into our odd-looking daughter’s ears.

This May 15 was overwhelming for this mom.

To everyone who put a heart on for Addy, thank you.

Thank you.